The Beauty Industry and the Myth of the 12-Step Routine: Embrace the Real Beauty Revolution

Growing up, I dealt with eczema and psoriasis, and I found myself constantly being prescribed different creams and treatments. I tried everything: steroid creams, ointments, and so much more. But honestly, all of those products just made things worse—burning, redness, and more dryness. Eventually, I got fed up. I threw it all away. I decided to simplify. I stopped overloading my skin with products and started embracing a more natural approach.

To my surprise, my skin healed faster and felt better. That experience made me realize how powerful it is to return to simpler, more natural routines. Beauty doesn’t need to be complicated or cluttered—it’s about balance, connection, and nourishing yourself from the inside out.

Beauty, at its core, is often seen as something external. We’re surrounded by imagery, products, and ideals that shape our understanding of what beauty should be, we’re inundated with a constant stream of images of perfect skin, hair, and bodies. But what happens when we pause and consider that beauty might not lie in the surface, but something that exists in your body and soul, waiting to be recognized?

To be clear, I’m not arguing that beauty rituals or self-care routines are inherently bad. In fact, they can be incredibly nourishing for the mind and body. But these practices should be about nurturing yourself—not fixing yourself. In recent years, there’s been a seismic shift in how we approach beauty—one that moves away from perfection toward authenticity. It’s the acceptance of imperfection, the recognition that the very things we often wish to hide are often what make us unique, and most importantly, human.

In The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf, she argues that beauty standards are imposed on women to limit their freedom and autonomy. The idea of beauty, she asserts, is one that society has defined and relentlessly imposed, often resulting in women working tirelessly to achieve something that may not even belong to them. This beauty is a construct, an unattainable ideal that doesn’t consider real human complexity. Yet, in The Body Is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor, we’re invited to break down the notion of beauty entirely. Taylor’s message is radical: rather than trying to mold ourselves into something external, we should embrace ourselves as we are, rejecting the pressures that tell us we need to look or be a certain way to be worthy.

The idea that beauty is linked to perfection is something that plays into the larger issue of body image.

In Body Positive Power, Megan Jayne Crabbe talks about how our bodies have been treated as objects of scrutiny and judgment, which causes many people to live their lives in constant dissatisfaction.

The more we chase a beauty standard, the further we get from feeling at peace in our own skin.

But how do we begin to shift our perceptions and find a beauty that feels natural, authentic, and truly self-affirming? We need to unlearn the idea that there’s a right way to look or be and embrace the messiness of being human. This means reframing beauty as something more organic, less about trying to “fix” our flaws and more about accepting them. Instead of erasing our scars, our wrinkles, or the things that make us unique, we should learn to see these as part of what makes us beautiful.

In her book The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené Brown talks about embracing vulnerability and imperfection as the key to living a wholehearted life. She explains that embracing our imperfections, instead of running from them, is what leads to a deeper sense of connection and belonging.

This is deeply tied to beauty, as true beauty comes from a place of acceptance and self-compassion. The more we embrace our imperfections, the more we allow ourselves to truly shine.

I’m thinking, the most powerful way to look at beauty is through the lens of self-compassion. According to Kristin Neff, a pioneer in the field of self-compassion, when we stop judging ourselves harshly, we allow ourselves to grow in ways that are truly fulfilling. Rather than constantly striving for external markers of beauty, we should focus on how we feel, on the care we give ourselves, and the way we show up in the world. It’s about listening to what our bodies need and allowing space for our inner beauty to be reflected outward. True beauty is felt, not just seen.

There’s also a deep connection between beauty and self-expression. In The Art of Self-Expression, it’s clear that beauty is something that flourishes when we give ourselves permission to express who we truly are.

Creativity, whether it’s through the way we dress, the way we talk, or the art we create, becomes a mirror of our internal world. When we embrace our individuality, when we allow ourselves to be uniquely who we are, beauty emerges naturally. It’s not about conforming to a standard; it’s about showing up in the world as our true selves, unapologetically.

In our current age of social media, beauty is constantly being defined by someone else’s standards. Yet, there is power in rejecting these external definitions. The Beauty Myth teaches us that beauty is a construction. It’s shaped by culture, history, and capitalism. When we let go of this external pressure and choose to embrace our flaws and our individuality, we reclaim beauty as something personal and empowering.

So, the next time you find yourself standing in front of the mirror, feeling the weight of society’s standards pressing on you, take a moment to pause. Instead of looking for what’s “wrong” with you, try seeing what’s right. Look for the things that make you uniquely you—the imperfections that make you real, the softness that makes you human. In those moments, you’ll begin to realize that beauty was never about conforming—it was about embracing yourself fully, exactly as you are.

By rejecting the idea of beauty as a fixed, external concept and instead focusing on beauty as an internal, personal experience, we liberate ourselves from the toxic cycle of comparison and dissatisfaction. True beauty, the kind that fills you up from the inside out, doesn’t come from products, standards, or trends. It comes from the way we choose to see ourselves, from the way we choose to show up in the world, and the way we choose to love and accept every part of ourselves. This is where beauty truly begins.

Sources:

Robins, G. (1993). The Beauty and Cosmetics of Ancient Egypt. British Museum Press.

Dash, B. (1992). Fundamentals of Ayurvedic Beauty Care. Concept Publishing.

Zhang, L., & Shen, Y. (2018). Traditional Chinese Medicine in Skincare. Springer.

Miller, P. (2014). Ancient Greek and Roman Beauty Rituals. Oxford University Press.

Akinnifesi, F. (2007). Indigenous African Beauty Practices and Ingredients. African Studies Review.

Patel, S. (2019). Natural Beauty Reclaimed: The Science Behind Minimalist Skincare. Oxford University Press

How the Beauty Industry Preys on Insecurities. (2019). The Guardian.

The Rise of the 12-Step Skincare Routine: Is It Really Necessary? (2021). Allure.

Holistic Beauty: The Secret to Natural Radiance. (2020). Harvard Health Publishing.